The first semester of my college career is coming to a close in one week.  For my English 101 class I am required to put together a portfolio that includes three previous assignments and an essay evaluating my work over the course.  The questions I have for the person reviewing my essay are really basic.  I would like to know first and foremost if I followed the requirements of the assignment.  I would also like to know if my essay flowed and if I used transitional sentences since I have had issue with those in the past.  Finally, is the essay well organized?  

Worries

          Yet again, I am supposed to be writing about chapter 58 on evaluations but, I cannot think about anything else but my final exam.  The exam is in two parts that will be taken on two different days.  I have never taken a written exam essay before and am nervous.  The instructor wants us to use a model and apply in to a film.  I can do that.  I did it before with Shrek the Third. Well, I hope I can do that.  I fear the unknown and it is a waste of energy. I think I should put my energy towards studying and becoming prepared for the final exam. 

My Writing Process Now

          I feel that I have advanced as a writer throughout my college English 101 course.  The assessment test from the college that placed me in this particular level of class did not prepare me for what I thought was going to happen in the class.  I thought that we were just going to diagram sentences and all that small stuff.  In reality, I was required to write several papers.  Thankfully, I learned new methods to generate material and pre-write.  I learned the difference between editing and revising.  That knowledge defiantly came in handy because I did a lot of revising this semester. 

Evaluations

           I am going to be completely and extremely honest: I am so tired of reading the material for these blogs.  Rather, I would like to talk about the evaluation essay for my portfolio.  I think I evaluated my work fairly.  I do not think that I gave myself too much credit or that I was unfair to myself.  And, I think that I achieved in completing the requirements for the assignment.  Although there have been many times of frustration and confusion, I have enjoyed the work throughout the course and feel that it had prepared me for further writing courses.  

My Writing Process before College

          Ever since I was a young child, I have loved to write.  I used to create tons of notebooks littered with writings.  And, my daughter has followed in my footsteps.  But before college my writing style was very different.  I did not pre-write or technically rough draft.  I would use the same file to make revisions. I have learned to save each step in a different file to prove that I actually came up with the ideas and did not plagiarize.  I have never written so many papers in a sixteen weeks’ time before.  I do feel that I am getting better with my writing skills and I am not as confused and discouraged when I sit down to write my papers.
 

Proposals

          A Modest Proposal to Improve Forest Management is example used in Chapter 62 that pertains to proposals. (Early in the course we were supposed to right a proposal.  I was smart enough to find this chapter to write my proposal even though it was not assigned at that time.)  Anyway, the proposal from above mentioned the fiscal conservatives and the liberal environmentalists do not trust each other’s motives: big surprise.  How can a group trust anyone no a days with all the crooked scams that are being played in politics?  Plus, many of these fiscal conservatives, in my opinion, cut funds to programs that are needed by society just so they can line their own pockets.

RN,DC,ND: Someday

          I am in my first semester at Waubonsee Community College.  I hope to join their nursing program and earn an RN degree.  Then, my goal is to enroll at National University of Health Sciences and earn a BA in Biomedical Science.  Unfortunately the university only offers night classes for a BA.  Finally, I hope to be admitted into the university’s Doctor of Chiropractic medicine and Naturopathic Doctor programs.  I will then have two years worth of internships at the National University’s on site health clinic.  It will be a long road but I know that it will be worth it.  I believe from the bottom of my heart that this is what I am on this Earth to do.  I want to help others find and practice an alternative way to true health. 

Confused about Transitional Sentences

          As I read through a memoir in chapter 60 of my English 101 course book, I see the paragraphs of the article jump from one topic to another without really relating to the same thing.  The first paragraph starts off by explaining a little bit of the author’s history and the thesis statement which is related to making friends.  The next paragraph starts off with describing another area that he had lived at as a boy.  I see this article going from subject to subject and apparently, the article is correct.  I do the same thing when I write and I get marked down…..I obviously do not understand transitional sentences. 

A Tough Experience

          The experience of development and writing has been a roller coaster.  I write everyday about my thoughts.  I like writing about things that interest me.  Even though I scored 100% on a college English placement test, I certainly was not prepared for what the class involved.  I have never been super great in an English class.  This class is no different.  From the very first assignment I didn’t really know what I was supposed to do.  I have read the book work and listened to my teacher in class yet putting my thoughts down in an articulate way is tough for me to accomplish.

Fantasy, Mystery, and Ambiguity Review

          Fantasy, Mystery, and Ambiguity, a literary analysis written by Philip Nel, discusses the first four installments of Harry Potter.  I really enjoyed what the writer had to say about the Harry Potter series, however, I didn’t feel that it was necessary to include similarities from other children’s fantasies such as Lloyd Alexander’s chronicles of Prydain, Susan Coopers Dark Is Rising series and Philip Pullman’s His Dark Materials trilogy.  I feel that just analyzing the Harry Potter installments would have been good enough on its own rather than bringing in examples that were never discussed further other than relating that children like to feel like they are something more than ordinary. 

Revisions, Revisions, Revisions

          I was pleasantly surprised with my conference with my English class.  I thought that my paper was going to be ripped to shreds and feared that I was not on the right path for the given assignment.  The hints I was given to revise my paper made sense and I am going about it by watching my scene from Shrek the Third again.  Having my teacher’s words in the back on my mind, I continue to rewrite my thesis statement to make it fit with the paper.  Overall I hope that the revising of my paper will meet my teacher’s standards.

We Are All Good and Bad

          In Fantasy, Mystery and Ambiguity, a literary analysis written by Philip Nel, one passage describing Harry Potter grabbed my attention.  “Just as we all must come to terms with who we are, Harry also wonders if some of his abilities make him a bad person.”  I always thought that the bad parts of me were not really me.  I recently learned that both the bad and good parts make up who I am.  They make up part of who everyone is.  Sometimes our abilities are not good or bad, they just are.  How we use our abilities is our choice.  We can choose to use our abilities for good or evil.   

Questions for my Conference

          Conferences are coming up and I have a couple of questions pertaining to assignment number three.  I would like to know the overall impression of my paper.  Did I fulfill the assignment?  Did I analyze the film I sis the assignment on properly? Was I able to capture the reader’s attention?  Was I able to keep the reader’s attention throughout the paper?  Did I create any new views on the movie Shrek the Third pertaining to stereotypes in women and how they are being portrayed to children?  What can I do differently within my paper to get a better result?  

Tired of Chapter 57

           I have written two previous blogs about different argument articles and I don’t want to write about them anymore.  Part of the reason that I do not want to write about an article in chapter 57 could be that the articles do not interest me what-so-ever and when I try to read them, I want to go to sleep.  I like reading articles that interest me.  Some topics that interest me would be environmental issues, women’s issues, and vaccines.  I read articles and arguments every day that pertain to one of those issues.  I wish I could pick an article off the internet that interests me to blog about.

Questions for my Reader

          I have several questions for my reviewers/readers.  First of all, does the first paragraph of my article pull you in?  Does it give you a sense of what the article will be about?  Is my stance clear and concise?  Is the paper well organized and does it flow?  Throughout the article, do I give you enough information so that you understand what you are reading and where I might go with the article?  Am I following the guidelines within the assignment?  How might I improve my writing? 

          I wish I could have actually asked the reviewer of my critical analysis paper these things.  The peer review I received was helpful and I can see where I need to improve.  I wish I could sit down with my teacher and get some answers…wait, I can…conferences!

Media Violence in my House

           For years the increase of violence in children has been blamed on the increase of violence in our media.  To an extent, I agree. But, it is not just the increased violence in films and games causing this; there is an increase of violence being shown on the news as well.  However, I also think that nowadays children are by themselves more than they used to be.  Many children today do not have the guidance from their parents to be taught that the stuff they see on TV or play on their games is fantasy. 

          With my own children I follow the age guidelines recommended on the films and view the films before my children do.  If by chance they see something violent, on TV or in real life for that matter, I talk to them about it and ask questions about how they feel about what they saw.  We have an open door policy in our house and the kids are free to ask me anything about any subject.  When kids have the proper guidance, they feel more secure and are able to process the negative things they see in the media.  

Prewriting Feminist

          While writing through a feminist approach on my critical analysis of Shrek the Third, I realized that I am way more of a feminist than I would have ever thought.  I also realized how utterly frustrating this society is in regards to the views of women.

          I can’t help but think of my children.  Questions start racing through my head. “Will my son respect women when he is an adult?”  Yes, he will.  His father is a great role model in the way he treats women.  “Will my girls feel powerful, secure, and safe when they grow up?” And that’s where I get scared.  There is so much pressure on women to be beautiful, thin and smart…but not too smart.  I find myself struggling on a daily basis of what I “should” be.  It has been hard to differentiate between what I “should’ be and what or who I am.  I came across several books that I will have to read so that I can teach my children and myself to be strong, safe, and comfortable with whoever they choose to be.

More Knowledge

          I wish that when I was a teenager, the internet would have been as accessible as it is for teenagers today.  It was only ten years ago when I was a teenager and internet was not as available as it is now.  So many advancements have occurred.  Teenagers of present day could not even imagine a world without Facebook.  I think that if I would have had access to the internet when I was younger, I would have had more knowledge and felt more involved in the world.  I appreciate having the type of access to the internet that we do today.  As an adult, I spend several hours per week on the internet researching topics such as nutrition, parenting, and politics.  Having the internet available to me makes me feel like I can make a difference in the world because I have access to people all over the world and I can share the information I learn with them.

Discouraged

          I have been struggling with the Critical Analysis project since it began.  I have no solid clue what I am supposed to be doing.  I read the handouts and examples but do not know how to create one myself.  Ugh!  Anyway, I wrote my proposal.  I am choosing to apply a feminist approach towards the film Shrek the Third.  I uploaded my proposal to the WCC site and felt crappy about it because I did not know what was expected in the proposal.  Then, I decided to look to my course book for help.  I found a section that explained what needs to be in a proposal and I started my paper over.  I uploaded the new proposal and feel a bit better about it but I am still discouragedL  

It's a BigPharma World

          One thing that makes me angrier than anything else is the way that big pharmaceutical companies exploit people.  I understand their place in the world and some good things have come from their labs, however, using people that do not have any other options or choices, as guinea pigs, to test if a particular drug will work and to see its side effects is unbelievably unethical and immoral. 

          Microbicides are compounds that can be applied inside the vagina or rectum to protect against sexually transmitted infections (STIs) including HIV.  These products are being tested on women in India.  The pharmaceutical company’s stance is that they are empowering the women of India by giving them an option to prevent the transmission of HIV since many of them do not have the option to refuse sex or demand a condom be used during sex. 

          It’s incredible that these gels and creams “may” help in protecting these women from HIV.   My question is why they test these products in India.  In my opinion, they targeted the women in this country because they do not have any other options to fight HIV.  It’s either risk getting HIV or let pharmaceutical companies use your body to experiment on and you could possibly prevent HIV.  These women are backed into a corner with only one way out….the pharmaceutical companies. 

          When the BigPharma companies were gathered around the table with this new product asking where the trials should take place, I’m sure they didn’t think, “We need to go to the country that needs the most help with preventing HIV.”  Nope, I think it was more like, “Where can we find enough desperate women that will not ask any questions about what we are giving them, who are quiet enough that if there is an adverse reaction won’t make much of a fuse, and expendable if they die from it...hmmm, India!”

A Feminist Approach

The critical approach that most interests me in analyzing a film is gender studies.  I feel that what films show of how and what women are supposed to be is inaccurate.  Unfortunately many people believe that there are certain ways women should act, dress, and think.  If a woman acts a certain way or dresses a certain way out of what society deems “normal” and “appropriate” then she is shunned and labeled hurtful nasty names.  Women have been portrayed as week, dumb, and slutty objects for far too long.  In most movies they are “emotional”, illogical and poo-pooed for their ideas and feeling.  Women are in fact, just as strong, smart and successful as anybody else.  It's time that films start portraying what and who women really are.

False Images

Magazines do more than lure people in with numbers and smart titles of articles, they lure people in by creating a false idea of what a person should look like and what they have to do to be as beautiful and successful as the people in the magazine.

The fact is the people in the magazine are produced.  They have multiple people working on them to make them look the way they do.  They have nutritionists and chefs to keep them eating healthy and staying thin.  They have hair stylists, make up stylists, people to tell them what to wear and fitness trainers.  And what’s worse, even after all that “work” their team has put into making them look “perfect”, graphic designers airbrush the photos to make them look flawless and thinner.  These people are not a realist view of “normal” people. 

It is ultimately our responsibility to feel secure within ourselves, however, the magazine companies are being totally irresponsible buy putting these “flawless” images on their covers and in their pages because young women are in the process of discovering their self-esteem and may be influenced to think that they can only obtain self-esteem and security if they look like the models that litter the pages of these magazines.   

Yes, That Will Work

I wondered why I was not been able to comprehend a complex book or article after reading it.  Come to find out, I was not taking the correct steps before I started reading the book.  In the past I would just start reading the book page by page taking notes along the way.  I love taking notes.  I fortunately have learned new tools to help me get a better understanding while I read.  The first thing I need to do is to glance through the chapters to get an idea of what I will be reading and learning.  Secondly, I need to glance through the entire book and read the first and last couple of pages.  By having an idea about what I will be reading, I think I will be better prepared when I actually read it.  I am defiantly going to apply this in my Biology class.

An Irked Realization

I am irked.  I was reading a Textual Analyses on poverty and the US.  Habitat for Humanity was brought up in the article.  I have mixed feeling about Habitat.

My parents divorced when my sister and I were in middle school.  My dad never paid his child support, provided health insurance, or anything a good father should have done.  My mom took care of us herself.  My mom was on disability and barley made $1200 a month, which included my sister and I’s social security.  Once you took out rent ($450) and the other bills, there was not much, if anything, left.  Now, my mom did the best she could but it was still very hard for my family.  We did not live in a nice house but rented a trailer, which looking back now probably was filled with fire-code violations.  We ate what we could afford, which was not much, and did not really get any of the extras, or needs for that matter, in life.  

Anyway, my mom sent in an application to Habitat for Humanity hoping to provide her children with a safe home.  She was DENIED!!  They said she made too much money….are you kidding me???  One adult and two children living on $1200 a month is too much?  We were living way under the poverty level yet no one helped.  No one cared.  I thought they were supposed to help those who lived in poverty?

 I agree and think it’s wonderful that Habitat is helping people build homes.  But, their message about wanting to end poverty is not going to happen when they forget about those who live it.

While writing this blog I realized I do not do enough to help others that are in the situation I was once in.  I need to help others and volunteer my time and money. I need to help.  I also realized and am grateful for everything my mom did for my sister and me.  Thanks mom:)

Revisions

             I can sometimes be a perfectionist and I like to have a step by step guide to everything I do.  That’s how I think.  Inside my head I have a little voice that is always telling me what the next step is whatever I may be doing.  

            Writing two profiles on a fellow classmate was difficult.  For me, writing papers is not an exact A-B-C step-by-step process.  You go from step three to step five and back to step one.  Just when I think I have a perfect paper, I re-read it and have to revise.  Many times I had to go back and think of new ideas. 

I have learned that writing is not an exact guide but a process that can take days.  The first day I wrote down ideas.  The second day I wrote a rough draft.  I reread through the papers multiple times and had my mom and husband re-read through the papers as well.  I ended up with two rough drafts full or corrections and ideas of both papers. My final papers did have some of the information that was in my drafts and included my major points and ideas. I was able to revise my paper with more details and more descriptive words to make my writing more intriguing.  Overall, I appreciate the art of writing more. I appreciate it as a process.

My Bubble was Burst

I always thought that the more educated a person is, the more peaceful they are.  I thought knowledge was power. In my view that power meant the ability to be logical and reasonable about a subject because you would have more knowledge about it.  I thought it meant you would no longer have to use violence because you would be smart enough to have different ways of solving a problem. To me violence meant ignorance.  

I read a narrative on Malcolm X called Literacy Behind Bars. The narrative went over how he learned to read and understand books by learning words in the dictionary while he was in prison.  I thought to myself that this guy must be incredibly smart with all the books he read.   I looked up Malcolm X on Google. (I was getting him confused with Nelson Mandela.) I learned a little about Malcolm X and who he was.  A lot more research is in order but part of a quote that upset me was “by any means necessary”…does that include violence? 

I have opened my eyes to my previous assumption.  Are highly educated people more peaceful? Why would such a seemingly smart man use or indorse violence?  Maybe smart people use their knowledge to form new ways and manipulate violence.

I have no conclusion to these thoughts; I defiantly need to do more research.  I guess that a person can be intelligent or book smart, and still be ignorant of what is right or wrong.  Today, my bubble was burst on my thoughts of how the world works.  My husband said something that I liked and felt fitting with this entry; “With power comes great responsibility…. or carnage.”

Ah, A Thesis?

            I have forgotten many things because I have been out of school for six years.  Anyway, I am now in a college English class and having to remember things like dependent clauses, thesis statements and how to write a paper has proven difficult.  Thank goodness for Google!

            I am writing two profiles on a fellow student.  I don’t really know if I am writing the paper correctly because I did not come up with my thesis statements until near the end of my writing process.  Reading through my paper, I think I have a thesis statement that represents and explains what my essay is about.  I guess we shall see once I get my papers back from my professor.  If the papers do not come back with good remarks, I am on my way to a tutor!

A Choice

A profile on poet Jimmy Baca really made me think about the people in this world.  A belief of mine is that you cannot excuse yourself from bad or destructive behavior just because you had a bad childhood or bad experience.  When we become adults we have the right and ability to choose who and what we want to be.

Jimmy Baca was abandoned by his parents when he was seven, lived in multiple detention centers, dropped out of school, was addicted to drugs and spent time in prison.  Not such a great life.  With all that we went through, Baca was able to make a choice to be something more. He became a poet and a writer. Now he is a teacher who helps children who are in his words the “worst of the worst.”

I admire that Jimmy was able to make a choice to want more and to be more.  He used the lessons he learned to help others.  With every event we experience, we have a choice; we can learn and grow from it, or we can let it destroy us bit by bit. 

Lessons from an Interview

In class last Wednesday our assignment was to interview a classmate.  We were given eight sample questions but urged to ask some of our own questions as well.  The objective of this interview was to get as much information as possible so that I would be able to write two profiles on the individual for different audiences.

I was immediately nervous thinking that I had to pick someone to interview.  I did not know anyone in the class.  To my relief, my teacher paired us up and I was able to skip the uncomfortable worries and wasted time finding a partner.

 Some of the sample questions were hard to answer.  A few of the questions included, "How do you see yourself as a person?" and "What do you want out of life?"  It's not every day that you get asked those questions.  Those questions took some time to answer and even now I am thinking about how to answer them personally.

It was interesting to find out about where my classmate was from and why he is attending college.  The interview gave me some insight on how he described himself and what his view of success was.  I noticed a yellow Live Strong bracelet that he was wearing.  He said he liked to help people and I thought the bracelet was evidence and a reminder of his statement.

Overall I think I gained surface knowledge about my classmate from the interview.  I intend on writing a profile that focuses on his career goals and another on how he is an interesting person.

A Surprising Interest

While reading several profiles, one by Sean Smith on Johnny Depp piqued my interest.  Truth be told, I was surprised by my reactions towards the profile.  I had never really cared for Johnny Depp in the past.  While I have enjoyed many of his films, I would never run out to see a movie just because he was in it.

"Fatherhood has a way of changing iconoclasts."  This was the first sentence in Sean Smiths profile.  First of all, I had no idea what the definition of an iconoclast was so I had to look it up in the dictionary.  Iconoclast is a person who attacks, or may I say disagrees with, settled beliefs or institutions.  Iconoclasts are also known as free spirits, non-conformists, and individualist.  Being all of that myself, I took interest in reading further.

I read briefly about Depp's journey growing up and how he became an actor. Quotes from previous directors and producers filled the paragraphs.  A couple of sentences describing his wife and children followed.  I very much liked how Depp wanted to make a movie for his children.  When Depp was at Disney and found out that the studio was developing a movie based on the theme park ride Pirates of the Caribbean, and that it was to be a "real pirate movie" with "real swords", he wanted in.  I  find it funny that Depp made Pirates of the Caribbean with Disney because Disney is so main stream and Depp has been known to be in movies that are strange and  that do not make a lot of money. Despite Disney being main stream and conservative, Depp was still able to put his own individuality on the character and essentially make the character of Jack Sparrow himself.

While fatherhood did change Depp by giving him a sense of meaning outside of being an actor, Deep still holds on to his non-conformity and individuality.  Deep never wanted to be on lunch pails or on the posters that line teen-age girls' walls and while his face is plastered on them now, it was done on his terms while still being a free spirit and staying true to himself.

Now that I have formed this new opinion about Johnny Depp, I just might have to see every movie that he has been in and look forward to seeing Pirates of The Caribbean again so that I might appreciate what he brings to the screen and possesses as an individual.